this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
the liver wants what the liver wants
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
