Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize