are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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