Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize