you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
