This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Randomize
