It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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