Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
