I would go down on you faster than GM stock
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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