yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize