Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
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