Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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