Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize