lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
