it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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