last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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