Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
How naked do you want me to be?
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