well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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