Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
