why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
