I cut my penus on the lid.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
