i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
