Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
