Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
