Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I love having hate sex.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
