Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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