I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
