Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize