this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
