are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Randomize
