There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
This baby is an asshole
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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