Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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