you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Randomize
