Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Couch. On fire.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
