we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Randomize
