I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
