i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
We need to get me chipped asap
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