You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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