one two three fourrrrnication!
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
We are two peas in an std pod
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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