it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
