Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
