Screwed.edu
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
