its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
My life is pants optional.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize