I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize