who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
