? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
