is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Randomize
