What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
