A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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