ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Randomize
