im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
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