I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
